A fair few of my clients come to me because they want to lose weight and feel better in their bodies. Even though they may not have the overt thought “I’ll be happy when I lose weight, or when I weigh a certain amount”, the underlying belief is there. It looks very real that weighing less or having a certain size body will make them happy.
For many women struggles with their weight has plagued there whole life, with yo-yo dieting a constant companion. Let’s face it, the conditioning within our society for women around body size is pretty consistent.
I have been working with a beautiful client for a few months who wants to weigh less, and is also caught up in the trap that her body looking a different way will equal feeling happy. As we explored together the inside-out nature of life things have started to look very different for her. She began by seeing that when she experienced difficult or ‘negative’ emotions that this doesn’t come from her outer circumstances. These feelings come to her from her thought in the moment ABOUT those circumstances. This was already an incredibly freeing insight to have.
However, as we explored further, another more powerful insight she had was that her happy feelings ALSO don’t come from her circumstances, her relationships, her job….or the weight of her body. In a series of fresh new thoughts, and perspective she saw that all the “I’ll be happy when….” thinking about her weight and her body was a trick. It wasn’t true and isn’t where real happiness comes from.
What I have seen with many clients is this: once all the pressure that happiness is somewhere in the future WHEN they lose weight is off their minds, there is much more mental and physical energy to start incorporating healthier daily habits with ease. And weight starts to stabilise naturally.
If you could like this kind of freedom and to get out of the “I’ll be happy when…” trap, contact me for an exploratory call to see how coaching with me can transform your life.
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